How Our Lives Have Changed: 3 Weeks

We’ve been in our new state, our new town, our new home for a little over three weeks.  In that time, we have moved in, started summer camp, and gotten married.  And we have settled in for the most part.  The Boy rebelled a bit for awhile when his camp turned out not to be exactly like his usual ESY experience, but he found some activities to love, and now looks forward to it each day.  I am desperately trying to find some form of employment, and unpacking and getting the house in order in the meantime, checking things off of my to-do list which has grown to several legal pad pages.  I have also been battling government offices to get my name changed, and to just get a driver’s license.  These things really shouldn’t be so hard when you are clearly a law-abiding citizen, but I digress…

The Ocean is Just Down the RoadOne of the most pleasant changes in our lives has been the proximity to Grammy and Poppy.  Besides being fabulous grandparents, they are also awesome parents, and great friends.  It has been exceptionally nice to have a girl’s afternoon with my mom here and there, and The Boy has enjoyed hanging out at their place in the afternoons, after camp.  As a former single mom who was never able to leave the house alone without the aid of a babysitter (and the requisite money involved), The Boy’s regular Saturday Night Sleepover at Grammy’s still brings tears to my eyes because I am just so grateful.  Every couple needs time alone, and this weekly respite is already oh-so-special.

The flip-side of this is that there are a lot more people in our lives on a daily basis, and this has taken a bit of getting used to.  We have to check with people now before we make decisions, and more compromise and flexibility are necessary every day.  This isn’t a bad thing, and it isn’t unexpected, but it is an adjustment.

We miss our friends, and I miss having adults to talk to, but this is no different from any other summer, for me.  I’m starting to have a hard time with not having something to do each day — I’m one of those people that needs to feel like I’m accomplishing something, and organizing my desk and hanging a few pictures just don’t qualify as “accomplishments”.  I’m trying to practice patience and perseverance in the job search.  Trying.

All in all, we are very happy.  The Boy is counting down the days until school starts, and is very excited.  I’m loving the summer sun and heat, reveling in the proximity of my loved ones, and enjoying being a newlywed.

Cheers! 😀

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Lost in the Shuffle

A lineup The Boy had me capture at camp

A lineup The Boy had me capture at camp

The Man and I are both feeling like The Boy is suffering from a lack of attention, lately.  We’re trying to compensate, but if you think about it, we needed him rather out-of-the-way for the move and the unpacking, and now the wedding is upon us.  The Boy has rolled with everything relatively well, although his summer day camp turned out to be more different than his previous ESY program than he thought was manageable — we’re still working on it.  Upset by the startling lack of computers at the camp, he was mollified a bit by the introduction of his own netbook at home on which he can make PowerPoints.

And of course, Grammy and Poppy have been amazingly accommodating, letting The Boy hang out at their place, and keeping an eye on him while I run errands as we get the house unpacked and ready for guests this weekend.

But both The Man and I feel as if we’ve made some promises on which we haven’t yet followed through, and we’re feeling a little guilty.  We talked about a new bike when we donated his old one (which was way too small), as well as a new boogie board, and a new “wrestling” mat.  He’s even supposed to get a new Captain-style bed, which The Man will make for him (The Boy likes to call it a “Hidey-hole” bed, because it will have a hiding space underneath), but it hasn’t happened yet.

We try to put it in perspective, and he hasn’t been complaining, but…  Those nagging feelings of guilt.  The Man and I are both people to whom a promise is no small thing, and we will follow through.  In the meantime, we have to make sure to spend time with him (even when he just wants to hole up in room with an electronic device).  Luckily, he’s been a great sport, and luckily spending time with him is something we can definitely do right now.

We’re Back…

Hello, Everyone!

I am so excited to be back!  The Boy starts his summer camp today and is so excited — it is absolutely adorable (if pre-teens can be adorable).  He picked out what he was going to wear a couple of days ago, even in the midst of the chaos of unpacked boxes here at the new house.  I told him this morning that he needed to have his backpack today and he would need to clean it out, so he was on it within seconds!

The moving process itself was not nearly as stressful as it could have been — it really helps to have a fiance who used to have a moving business.  Dealing with the landlord is still giving me a headache, but the end is in sight.  I’m sure I’ll post more on that whole topic later.

Modern Social Security card.

Right now, I am in the midst of a brand new headache — trying to get setup with my new address.  I’m stuck in a never-ending cycle between needing a driver’s license, and needing a social security card, and another form of ID…  Except that I just moved here — AND I’m getting married!  Of course they couldn’t make it too easy, or everyone would move here – right? 😉

Finally, we’re getting details nailed down for the wedding which is NEXT FRIDAY – Can you believe it?  I certainly can’t.  The Man is getting himself used to calling me his wife (introducing me to neighbors and such), and it’s still such a foreign word.  But I like it.  We ordered our rings, changed our venue last minute (from one free city park gazebo to another free city park gazebo), and even checked out a few restaurants downtown, looking at menus and deciding on one which would work best.  All that’s left is to get the license and decide on what we’re going to say…

There are so, so many things on my list of things to do (like get a job!), but I am so glad to be back up and running here.  I hope you’ve all hung in there, because this transition is going to be a bit of a wild ride.  But I am so excited!

No Need to be Nasty

Waiting Room by Melissa Venable

Waiting Room by Melissa Venable

The camp that I’d like to send The Boy to this summer, in lieu of ESY has an 11 page application, part of which must be filled out by his physician. We were just at his doctor’s office last week, getting his booster, but when I approached the desk to ask about getting this filled out, no one seemed interested in helping me, and rather than stand there like an idiot, I decided to leave and call about it later. I called today, and politely explained to the woman on the other end of the phone that I needed to get this paperwork filled out by May 10. She responded that the doctors in the practice didn’t “just do that”, meaning fill out paperwork for camps and such, and that we would have to have a physical. I expected this, and when she asked when his last physical was, I told her August, and she then replied that he would have to wait until a year after that physical, and went to disconnect the phone! I raised my voice slightly, explaining that we were moving in June, so waiting until August was an impossibility, and that I had spoken to someone in her office who had said that it depended on our insurance when another physical could be done. I assured her that we were in the clear according to our insurance, and could we schedule a later appointment for this, due to my son having autism, and hating to miss school? She grudgingly offered up a 3:30 appointment in May, and I asked if there was anything later in the day, as The Boy is still in school at that time. She responded that that was the latest appointment she had before our deadline, adding that the late appointments fill up fast because everyone wants them after school.

I shouldn’t have to fight for an appointment! I shouldn’t have to raise my voice to get the service that I need! If you would like my son to be having a meltdown when he comes for his physical, than by all means, continue to be flippant with me about how everyone wants late appointments!

This is not the first time I have had issue with the office staff in this practice. Two summers ago, I was running a summer camp, and couldn’t leave until the last camper had been picked up. Of course, I had The Boy with me because we had an appointment scheduled about 30 minutes after camp was over. Unfortunately, the parent of this camper was extremely late. I called the office after he had finally been picked up, and explained that I would be 10 or 15 minutes late, knowing that usually one waits at least 45 minutes to see an actual doctor. The staff member proceeded to lecture me about being late, and that they would have to cancel my appointment. I pressed the issue, saying that we would be right there, and couldn’t we just keep our appointment time, and she lectured me again about being responsible about keeping appointment times, refusing to see us. I swore I wouldn’t go back, but when you have a child with special needs, finding a doctor who understands your child’s background is essential, and you often have to make compromises.

I can remember loving the dentist I had as a child, and hating his office staff and his dental hygienists with a passion. And we actually did leave the practice of The Boy’s first dentist because they couldn’t be flexible with appointment times.

Don’t these people understand that they drive people away when they treat them this way? They create anxiety in the patient, and they create mistrust with the patient’s caregiver, namely me! And in these days and times of social media, consumers have no compunction about telling all and sundry about their experiences with your business, especially if they were negative. I just don’t understand how they get away with it, and I’m glad I won’t have to be dealing with this particular office staff again!