3 Guest Limit

Thursday, The Boy has his 8th Grade Celebration. When I first heard about it, I only heard the name and the date, not a description. I thought it was an end of the year dance for 8th graders, as is quite common.

It’s not.

It’s an awards/graduation ceremony, and at first I thought about us not going. The kids have to sit on the stage the entire time, and my experience with awards nights was that they drag on interminably. Not very autism-friendly. Plus, they are dictated to wear “Sunday clothes” (I hate that term), which for boys means a nice pair of pants and a collared shirt. Not The Boy’s preferred clothing, either.

But I consulted with his TA, and she seemed to think he would be fine, and that it shouldn’t last longer than an hour and a half. So, I sent in the RSVP that we would attend. Here’s the thing: they give the kids tickets, and each kid is limited to three.

I completely understand that there are families who will bring the entire extended family (and usually air horns) to an event like this, and there is limited space. I get that. But three?

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What if a kid has parents who are divorced and remarried? Who gets to go?

What if a family has 3 children or more? Who gets to go (or pays for a babysitter)?

What if a family has 2 parents and 2 grandparents that attend their only grandchild’s events like ours?

The stepdad bows out and gives up his seat so both grandparents can go, that’s what happens. And even though I know it’s doesn’t bother The Man too much, it still kinda stings. And rather than being a celebration, it becomes a compromise, which kinda ruins the whole thing. Shame on the school that can’t accommodate families when all they want to do is celebrate their child. Together.

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The Show Must Go On (Without Us)…

The Stage

The Stage by Luminitsa

My parents are in town for a bit, for The Boy’s choir and band concerts this week (and also because they haven’t seen him since Thanksgiving and were missing him big-time!), and we went to a musical put on by the district in which I work.  The Boy even dressed up in his dress-up clothes to attend.  We arrived, purchased our tickets, as well as flowers for PITA, who runs the show, and finally raffle tickets for some baskets of goodies.  We found our seats, and enjoyed the first half.  At intermission, The Boy and I got up to stretch, and buy a small treat.  We purchased our M&Ms, walked around the lobby while we ate them, and returned to our seats.

Before the end of the intermission, they did the drawings for the raffle baskets, and that’s when things started going wonky.  Remember that The Boy has only had a few experiences with raffle baskets, and luckily for him at the time (but not so luckily for us at it turns out), he has won virtually everything he has attempted to win.

But today, we didn’t win.

And even though I had prepared him for this possibility (taking pictures of the baskets, assuring him that we could always purchase the contents on our own), he began to melt.  And we had to leave.  Luckily, I was prepared for this, and had even scoped out how far we were from the aisle, making sure we wouldn’t cause too much disturbance if we had to leave.  I have learned from past mistakes, it seems (why is it always at a play??).

The Boy is still upset, wanting to have a “funeral for our luck” – clever even while not comprehending the larger concepts, here.  And he will probably be in a funk for a little while.

So while we had planned to go to the show and then for dinner afterwards, we’re all quickly shifting to plan B.  Thank God for take-out!