Money Matters

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We have rekindled our love for independence skills!

A couple of weekends ago, The Boy and I knocked out a whole bunch of our remaining tasks from The Independence Challenge we started last year in one fell swoop by planning, shopping for, preparing, cooking, and presenting a meal to Grammy, Poppy and The Man. With help, he made a big pan of baked pasta with meat sauce, salad, and bread. By the end of it, I could tell it had been taxing to stay on task for so long, but he had been a trooper.

Last week, we sat down with some fake money I had purchased on Amazon. I printed up some imaginary bills from a cell phone company, the cable company, a car finance company, etc. and we sat down to talk about money. I gave him a paycheck for being a professional tuba player (his choice of career), which he exchanged for dollar bills. I presented each bill, and we counted out the bills necessary to pay them. I kept remarking about how much each bill seemed to take from that big pile of money. When all the bills had been paid, there wasn’t much left, and I reiterated that that was why you couldn’t just spend what was in the bank willy-nilly.

We also discussed which bills were absolutely necessary and why. “You have to pay for your car so you can get to work,” he said. Exactly. “But maybe you can reduce your phone bill by not using a smart phone or something if the bill costs too much,” I explained.

He seemed to understand and enjoy the exercise. Again with most of these activities, these are just an introduction, but it gives us a basis for further exploration. And this one may be the end of the notion that I can just go to the bank to get more money to buy a new computer 😉

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Responsibility

I’m pretty lucky. The Boy generally does what I ask him to do. Unless, of course, he is in the middle of something. And generally, if I set a timer for five minutes or so, he will usually do it then.

Last Sunday, I decided that he should help me prep his lunched for the week. Pretty simple tasks involved, like counting 12 crackers and 12 pepperonis to put into snack bags. The cheese is a bit more complicated, involving a knife and cutting, but I figured he could help me with the bulk of it. I gave him five minutes, and he came to help, doing what I asked. My goal is to get him to the point where he can do this himself every Sunday, because why not?


It took awhile, mostly because he is so careful when he does tasks like this. It would have been much easier for me to do it myself, but then, I won’t always be there, will I?

Every time we do something like this, I give myself an internal high five, and The Man and I look at each other and say, “He needs to do more of this.”

I’m off to brainstorm more ways he can “help,” so we can add them bit by bit…

Baby, I’m Amazed

We’ve been keeping up with the #keystoindependence challenge, and I have to say in the short time we’ve begun, I have already learned so much about my son.

12933009_738098856325388_789378537205830466_nOn day 2, when I was teaching him about fire safety, I was amazed at how little he knew about what to do in a fire. I know that in his nine years in school, they have had various fire safety discussions, assemblies, etc. But The Boy pretty much had no clue about first feeling the door, and crawling to avoid smoke. Then I was blown away again by how quickly he learned it, and retained it. When The Man got home, I asked The Boy to tell him what he learned, and he did. When I asked him to tell Grammy & Poppy what he learned the next day, he did. No repetition was necessary, no flashcards… Just role play. Amazing.

Yesterday, we tackled changing a lightbulb. I showed him where we keep them and how to check to see if it’s a good bulb or not by shaking it. We went to the office and found a lamp that wasn’t being used. I showed him how to unscrew the bulb, and screw the new one in. I asked him to try and he hesitated to touch either bulb because he thought they were hot. I had to convince him that they were both cold – he had just seen me touch both of them, but still thought he might get burned.

I think as parents we assume our kids know a heck of lot more than they actually do. I think some of us still don’t realize we are the adults, and it is our job to adult now, and teach our kids how to do the same. I think all of this is human nature. I think that’s why we need to challenge ourselves a bunch. I thought this month would be about me teaching The Boy necessary skills, and it is. But he is teaching me so much more, as usual. ❤

Keys to Independence Challenge

One of my greatest worries in life is what The Boy will do when I am gone. My goal, and the goal of most special needs parents, is to prepare my son to be the most independent person he can be. We don’t know yet what his living situation will be, nor do we know how and where he will work. But right now, I can prepare him for the basics, and I can do it by introducing him to things adults do every day. Each introduction may or may not be successful, but at least he will have had the experience so that we can build on it in the future.

Here is the Keys to Independence Challenge I mentioned last week.

Keys to Independence Challenge

 

How does this work?

For each day of the month of April, you attempt to introduce your child to the skills above. If they’ve already had experience with it or do it on a regular basis, try switching things up a bit to increase flexibility. If you’d like to document your work with a picture or a status update, you can do so on social media with the hashtag #keystoindependence so people can check it out and get some inspiration.

Is this only for teenagers?

Nope. You can totally do many of these with younger children, with a little forethought. It could just be learning about the skill rather than actually performing it, too.

Is this only for kids with special needs?

Heck no! I know some neurotypical adults who could benefit from this practice! 😉

What if we miss a day (or three or five)?

Hey, life happens. Especially in a special needs home. No worries! You can skip it completely, or come back to it in May, if you’d like.  No one is keeping score.

What if my kiddo doesn’t want to do it?

The Boy is of an age where he relishes the thought of being an adult, and having a little independence.  I’ve prepped him a bit for this, but I have some backup incentives, too. Think about what motivates your kiddo and see if you can’t build that into the challenge.

What if I don’t understand what the day’s task is?

Interpret for yourself, or check my facebook page or social media and search for the #keystoindependence hashtag – you’ll see at least my take on the day’s prompt.  I just opened up an Instagram account for this very purpose @SimpleIJustDo! But there are no right or wrong answers here.

What if I don’t want to post about it or post pictures?

No worries! You do you! But we’d love to hear how it’s going for you! If you do decide to post, just include the #keystoindependence hashtag so we can find you.

If you have more questions, feel free to let me know. I’ll be posting about the challenge on my facebook, twitter, and now instagram accounts if you want to follow. If not, I’ll still be posting about regular stuff, too.

As always, thanks for your support, and here’s to an enriching April!