The Tuba is Here

tuba practiceIt seems the crisis has passed, although I have had to email the band director to find out the current assignments, and to ask him to make changes to his last quarter grade based on the tests I had sent him on video.  I think “maintenance” will be required within our new arrangement, but I don’t think they will again try to steamroll me into something that just isn’t right.

The tuba has arrived, and I again thank all of my readers that tried to help.  I actually found a decent one on ebay, and it is a smaller, easier size for The Boy to handle.  It isn’t pretty, but it does work, and hopefully we can work from where we are now.

According to the director, The Boy has begun playing more in class, but is still having problems starting with everyone else.  I had asked to come in and take video to do some reverse modeling, as suggested by the autism specialist, but the director was not comfortable having me come in to do that – just wanted me to “explain” to The Boy when to start playing.  So we continue to play this game, with him pretending like he is making accommodations and modifications, when he really just doesn’t get it, and isn’t going to lift a finger to try.

But I see progress, and I’ve stopped them from going down the usual path when they encounter a kid who “doesn’t meet the criteria,” so maybe, just maybe they’ll think twice before doing it to the next kid.

The Lego Movie: An Autism Mom’s Review

Last weekend, Grammy and I took The Boy to see the Lego Movie, and if you haven’t seen it, you should.  It is delightful, and not just for children.

The main reason I enjoyed it was the message.  For years, I have lamented the lack of room for creativity in today’s schools.  I used to have a poem somewhere about how school crushes creativity by creating sameness, and the paradox is that in a society that claims to celebrate the individual, the opposite is usually the case, at least as I have observed.

When I was young, I was involved in Odyssey of the Mind, which was a contest in creativity, giving kids the parameters of a problem, and seeing how they could solve the problem.  I don’t even know if it exitsts anymore, but  I doubt kids today would have any interest in something like that, let alone excel in it, and it’s through no fault of their own.

The Boy's building - no instructions! - constructed at the Lego exhibit at the museum last year

The Boy’s building – no instructions! – constructed at the Lego exhibit at the museum last year

In fact, Legos themselves have changed over the years, increasingly being sold in kits with directions on how to make something specific, rather than a bucket of bricks with which to make anything a kid desires.  This can create problems in an autism household when a specific brick goes missing, and therefore the directions cannot be followed!  I posted about a fix for this a long while ago, but directions can become a problem, for sure. The message of the movie, surprisingly, was that it doesn’t have to be that way.  That there is a benefit in following the directions, and teamwork, but that it has to be balanced with individual desires, and creative thinking.

From the autism mom’s perspective, I watched my son actively engaged throughout the movie, often laughing loudly, and catching lots of the subtle jokes.  It was fantastic to see him enjoy it so much.  And Grammy and I enjoyed it thoroughly, as well.  If you haven’t gone, you need to.  There’s a reason it’s still in the theaters!

Happy Birthday to My Man

DSC00478The Man and I have just celebrated being married for 8 months, and today is his birthday.

If you’ve been following along, he and I have known each other for years, and I started to crush on him pretty hard after I got divorced.  He has also known The Boy for years, and often entertained him when we were on vacation down here with my parents.  He even taught him to ride a bike, and has recently succeeded in getting him to stand up on the surfboard while riding a wave in by himself – such a triumph after years of “lessons”!

He was nervous about getting married, but has since settled in, and enjoys marriage now, as do I.  Quite simply put, he’s my best friend, I love spending time with him, he makes me laugh, and we are good together.

There is also a considerable age difference between us, which has always bothered him more than it has bothered me.  He often wishes I had some grey hairs so people wouldn’t mistake him for my dad (this has only happened a few times, although it is irritating), but I think over time, he has seen that it rarely comes up, and isn’t an issue in the least.

He is a good man, and I am so lucky to have him.  And for the next seven months, he is only sixteen years older than me, rather than seventeen.  Happy Birthday to The Man, The Only Man For Me!