My son remembers just about everything.
A couple of years ago, he made Fabulous Babysitter buy him a St. Pat’s-themed head band with orange pigtails that got some pretty strange looks when he wore it. He was oblivious, of course, but the rest of us weren’t. This is one of the tough parts of being an autism parent (or caregiver, or teacher). We don’t want to deny them anything that makes them happy (at least nothing as benign as this), but we also don’t want them to be targets for the less compassionate public at large.
A few years ago, it was a beanie (complete with propeller!) that The Boy had found around Halloween at a costume store. Harmless, right? Until I got the note home from his teacher that he was being teased, and could we please keep it at home…
And part of me screamed, “No! Let’s concentrate on the teasers and not the one being teased!” while the other part said, “Oh, for sure. I so get it.”
Fabulous Babysitter took The Boy out on Fun Friday, and he wanted to get some St. Patrick’s day “stuff”, and he dragged her from place to place (although she would never call it that), until he remembered the exact store they had purchased the pigtail-headband the last time. And they purchased it again. And again, we ask ourselves – is it better to let him be himself, or help him to assimilate?